With a new beginning, comes a rediscovery

Have you ever noticed how, when one thing ends, another just begins?

I'm scheduled for a Hysterectomy on April 23rd. I am very scared, but have to admit that the idea of continuing with the constant pain that I have now, is even more frightening.
My life, for the last several years, seems to have been one issue after another. Depression, pain, discomfort, fear, anxiety, and a whole bunch of other stressful, and life changing situations.

As a result of all of this, I cannot say that I have been "at my best" for a long, long time. Yet, today, I am encouraged. Let me tell ya why.

In two weeks, I will have surgery, then spend time recovering. I am going to take that time to recover from the procedure. I am also going to take the time, to recover from the last few years.

Somewhere, along the way, I lost myself. I miss the "old" Chantal. The carefree, independent and strong women I once was. I was always energetic, almost to annoyance. I loved to laugh and play. I loved people. Yes, I was a flirt too. Man, I miss those days.

Today, I am looking forward to rediscovering her. I do not plan to stay in this state of ill health. I hate feeling weak, unable to do things. I despise the idea that I am holding others back. I want to be able to stand on my own two feet, confident of my own strength.

So here are my post surgery plans:
I will be going back to the gym. I plan on keeping myself healthy

I want to jump out of a plane. Why? Well, because I saw my best friend take the plunge, and have to admit I admire her so much for it. She made it look amazing, and made me realize that I too need to shake things up in my life

I am going to do cartwheels. Ok, so I probably will not be graceful, but who cares

I am going to climb a rock wall, to prove to myself that I can do it again.

I am also going to take chances, to let people know that I love them, and appreciate them every single day.

I am going to laugh, hopefully so hard, that I tear up. Life is far too short to stop playing.

I am going to love, because I believe that even if there is pain, I would rather spend my life having known and experienced love, than to spend the rest of my life afraid of getting hurt.

I will do my best to stop worrying, and to enjoy the moment. Let's face it, it's all we have.

I guess the "old" Chantal is already starting to return.

Yeaaaa me!